J Desk 4 - 5 p.m.

What I'm doing between questions: totalling the stats for the month and entering analytics on a book of American writings about Paris.

* Internet signup
* She's having trouble (not exactly computer literate--but very nice)
[It's dead quiet in here today. Must be the rain...?]
* Headphones return, but we never took an ID (?) and they didn't exit the game
* Pen & paper
[suddenly lots of middle school kids here...minding their own business and staying quiet]
* Where do you keep the kids' bios? [now that's irony for ya]

1 - 2 p.m.

What I'm doing between questions: 1) moving kids' bios. of Lincoln, Washington and MLKing out of 921 and into [so-called] proper numbers, and 2) barcoding new books.

* "Why can't we email the government from here?!" [you can, but you have to use a free email account] "So I have to go back to Yahoo?" [yep] groan/sigh
* Shifty pair of teens arrive. Y'know, if you stop checking to see if I'm watching you, I'm less likely to know that I should be watching you. Dolts [why aren't they in school? I guess looking for pictures of tattoos is more important...]
* Circ person looking for patron from H--she left her card case at the computer
* Hotmail redesign has patron confused
* A different circ person, this time looking for last Wednesday'sChicago Sun-Times
* [phone] Overcoming Overspending and HeartMath Solution; we don't own either so they are ILL'd for her
* Word proc

[v. quiet from 1:30 - 2--the calm before the storm?]

11 - 12 noon

What I'm doing between questions: 1) preparing to shift World Book, New Book of Science and New Book of Knowledge as our current eds. have arrived...some to the kids' section, some to adult circ... It's mildly confusing. 2) moving kids' bios. of Lincoln, Washington and MLKing out of 921 and into proper numbers.

* Word proc
* ...times 2
* Someone walked into one of the staff offices last night and swiped our 'hidden' copy of the local paper--I get to hear another version of the tale
* Printer payment [striking turquoise ring]
* Patron request for Investor's Business Daily; Periodicals librarian says we will be getting it starting this summer. A happy patron!
* Marker (and he even brings it back!)
* Books/DVDs on Mt. Everest [we have loads of books, no DVDs, but he's happy]
[Director points out a Dewey bio option of keeping bios in 920 and adding their field after the decimal point. I'm so glad she doesn't really expect me to do this. Is Dewey headed in this direction? God help everyone who has been moving them to the subject fields, i.e. MLKing to the 323s. Will we have to move him to 920.323 next?!]
* Dandelion Wine. On tape/CD

9 - 12 noon

What I'm doing between questions: catching up yesterday's entry. Trying to find a decent book to read for myself. Doing my self-evalation, prior to having my boss evaluate me and (I hope) give me a raise. Digging out old "need to fix" projects from earlier this year to see how they are faring. Sorting 'fly box' items and labeling them so I know what each stack is for.

* Online info re opposition to gun control. For her son. Grrr
* Jobs PC signup / forgot her card / "Do you have a blue ink pen?" [no]
* Internet signup
* Someone tries to use the phone jacks in the study rooms to plug his laptop in and get online. I guess they never were enabled. Hmm, since I'm the only librarian here, there's no one to ask about this. He has to go home to work
* Change card number in SAM
* The Way to Eat [we don't own; I ILL it for him] He also mentions the "Tax Forms" sign: "Weren't we supposed to pay taxes a month ago??" Smart-mouth.
* [I mention the broken ref desktop to the custodian. He starts fixes it temporarily and says he'll get some more brackets. There is a giant crack between the sections now.]
* Librarian T arrives because the 8th graders are returning today at about 10:45
* Guest Internet user signup
* Paper clip
* Difference between summary view and detail view on a job exploration site
[The kids have arrived. Quietly. Really!]
* Needs specific book on Autoimmune Diseases; it's in the New Books area, not regular nonfiction
[Conference with director re consortial director's meeting today]
* How does copier work?
[Next batch of kids arrive]
* [phone] Summer of My German Soldier for high school teacher
[We also have a class of younger parochial school kids here now]
* Books on pregnancy and childbirth in Spanish. And some for dads too
[More questions from director re today's meeting]
* How to cite an article in an encyclopedia for bibliography
* Reminder from circ person that the kids need ID with address to get library cards [duh]
* Patron R is here. We chat; I show him New Mom Librarian's latest online photo album
* Little boy writes over Patron R's document. Luckily, boy doesn't click on save! Good thing R likes kids, too
* Change barcode for SAM use
[I wipe down phones and keyboards with Clorox wipes so Librarian J doesn't get sick from my germs....sigh]
* Martindale-Hubbell Directory of attorneys; ours is the 1997 ed. so he chooses to use phone books and cross-reference back to MHD

Coughs: every 10-15 minutes
Lost voice: every 20-30 minutes, briefly

Tuesday 11-12 noon

(It was too busy to do this "live.")

* About 30 members of 8th grade class from one middle school arrives, as they will be all day, to work on their research papers (about 30 minutes each)
* Print job payment, times two
* Can't find book to match call number on steroid abuse...well, he didn't write down the whole thing. I find one anyway
* Anything on Animal Welfare
* Of course: family member arrives to harrass me
* Internet signup
* Anything on Community Service
* Girl with a Pearl Earring--was that a book before it was a movie? [Yes] Do you have it? [Yes, but it's checked out] She dithers
* Pen
* Net signup
* Pen
* Librarian T fills me in on gossip re this 8th grade thing, in between fielding multiple, forgotten questions from them

Most outstanding moment: I realize the seam between the two parts of the reference desk counter has come unglued. Like the librarians themselves.

9 - 10:30

What I'm doing between questions: Updating the "Where Can I Find...?" brochure

* [phone] ...my usual wake-up call from family member...
* Art. Well, ok actually pottery
* Some SAM confusion combined with language confusion. Resolved amicably -- didn't undertand that PIN and Password mean the same thing. Plus, you have to take Caps Lock off...
* [phone] 100 Years of Solitude (our copies are checked out--reserve for her)
* [phone] Reserve Job PC for tomorrow
* Word proc
* We have a hamster and a guinea pig visiting for story time.
* Some guy has found a game site on the 'net that we have not blocked. I play with SAM enough to find that he owes for print jobs. So I block his card. heh heh
* Patron asks if new books are "around the corner." [Yep] I tell her she can reserve anything she doesn't see on the shelf and she happily goes to get a library card so we can do that. [hurrah a happy person]
* Big City patron looking for Lord of the Flies on CD or tape [it's not on Amazon, sorry]. Our copy is on hold for another person, and no one else owns it except in print format

I'm off to the chiropractor.

1 - 2 [redux]

* Just sit down to use the Internet if you've already signed up
* Internet "just blew up and rebooted" and now he can't log on because SAM thinks he's still online; I fix his record in SAM and away he goes again
* All in-house database use grinds to a halt; we're frozen
* I kick people off computers (they are staring at the screens, waiting), and find our PC Tech, "Sleek" [don't ask]
* Oooh, Mom Librarian is here with her sleeping baby (hmm, she arrived just as the computers all froze...)
* People try to log on computers that are OFF. D'oh
* Any idea when we'll be back up? [anytime from 2 minutes to tomorrow sometime] Is someone working on it?? [I want to kick him--"YES!"]
* "Soon," says Sleek
[The entire adult non-fiction/Reference area has about 5 people in it right now. Yes, school has not let out--TG for small favors--and yes it is a gorgeous day, but ... 5?!]
* I clean computer monitors
* We're up again (25 minutes)
* Books on ebay
* Internet password

11 - 12 noon

* World Book question (how to use the Study Aids at the end of the articles)
* Word proc
* "Red Scare" of the 1920s (NOT McCarthyism, as Librarian J keeps asking)
* Tax forms (??)
* World Book guy can't spell "kamikaze"--it must be Friday. He's having a terrible time
* Chall#ng#r C#nt#r director Internet signup
* Word proc guy's cell phone works! (he was here trying to figure it out on Wednesday)
* ILL person doesn't know what to do about notice from LoC
* "The computer's done something wild and crazy" [right justified--pretty wild]
* [phone] Test proctoring; she'll be in this afternoon
* Weekly local newspaper
* Paper & pencil
* Local paper lady gives it back and thanks me
* Big-City cardholder Internet signup

1 - 2

* [Covering for A again; this is the longest bout of food poisoning I've ever heard of!]
* [phone] Bergey's manual of determinative bacteriology -- we don't have it, she needs it quick for the end of the semester, she has no card...
* [phone] Easy to Remember -- we don't have it but I ILL'ed it for her
[wow two book requests in a row!]
* Why are summer camp books in the 796s? [oh jeez, I dunno--cuz Dewey says?]
* Paper for printer
* Can I throw this away? and How to get a card
* Can I copy the cemetery directory? and How to use copier
* Continuations-cataloging questions from tech
* Pay for prints
* More weird cataloging s--t (good thing people check up on me!)
* "Can I help you?" [no, he just walks slow, but he's nice about saying no at least]
* Same man needs tax forms [walks slow + blind]
* Yet another tech question. This time we need barcodes

9 - 12 noon

* [It's 9:15, and I just finished updating yesterday's entry. The circ person brought me the papers just now and that's my first contact with anyone today. Could be slow...?] [later: HAHAHA]
* [phone] Do we have a computer to use a CD-ROM with? [I think so, if he's going to try to read something off one...]
* Another patron waiting while I answer the phone question needs to print something off a CD-ROM of his own
* Librarian JK finds me to tell me that Librarian A is still sick, so it looks like I will be at Ref. pretty much all day today. Whee. Not. [so much for a quiet day]
* ILL question; ILL person isn't here today, so I can't really tell patron anything about her DVDs that she wants to renew. I promise that we'll call her when we hear from the owning library
* Reserves for two books on Medicaid that we don't own
* [I can't work this afternoon when I said I would--I have to pick someone up at school. And I can't find Library K; oops, she's in story hour]
* CD-ROM guy from the phone is here to look over his stuff. Computer explodes; I have to reboot, which takes more than 5 minutes...finally, he's able to start learning about his cell phone!
* First CD-ROM guy pays for his print job
* [I notice that we now have extra copies of tax forms for extending your time to file squirreled away behind the desk here. Every year...]
* CD-ROM guy can't figure out how to use the menu; he's not exactly tech-savvy...
* "How do you spell the last name ----?" ...sounds like "whirl" [I give him some possibilities and send him back to start trying them and any others he can think of]
* [Librarian M says she will cover a few of those problem hours this afternoon, at least long enough to allow me to do the school pickup]
* Do we have 2-year-old issues of USA Today newspaper. [nope]
* CD-ROM guy needs more help. Those mice, they are tricky... :-)
* Pay for print jobs
* Books on kleptomania? [no] "Well, then I'll write one." [well, then ok]
* Tax help is downstairs (he doesn't look old enough for AARP!)
* Word proc
* Word proc (Virus Woman) and what happened with Lamb?
* Klept. guy is back, to use the 'net to find an author for his book. I suggest Writers Market/LMP [10 minutes--no dice: MUST--USE--INTERNET!] I register him [10 minutes], I help him log on [5 minutes]. [I think his IQ is about 90...confirmed later by other staff who actually have now rescued me twice from him in the ensuing half hour]
* First word proc. user wants to know if he can scan something in; he lost the disk it was on [no]. He is annoyed, but not at me. I don't think
* Internet registration/lost wallet (turns out he lives in an area where there is no library service, but he doesn't tell me that). I send him up front to get a new library card; he yells at them because they want to send him back here to get a Temp User number for the 'net. He leaves. Thank God for small favors.
* Tax help is downstairs (she's definitely old enough for AARP!)
* Changed card number, needs to be changed on SAM/Internet -- he has an adorable little boy with him who's actually pretty well-behaved
* [OMIGOD--No Social Skills is helping Klepto-Man! Better him than me]
* [Can't it please be lunchtime, or time to go home, now?]
* Anything in the library on saving farmland? Not the internet; he needs books! Imagine that
* Word proc
* Floppy disk purchase
* Patron needs state Circuit Breaker (tax) form, possibly the easiest form in the world. Doesn't know how to do it. Coughs on me profusely. Breathes on me profusely, and stands way -- too -- close. Doesn't understand why one copy of the form is back/front and one copy is 2 pages, front only. I send him down to the AARP people downstairs. And then go wash my hands, and arms, in hot water. Would like to wash clothes, face, hair and vomit too.
* Word proc, with password
* Librarian JK tells me that other staff members don't know about one of the middle school's big year-long project that each student has to do in 8th grade, which they've been doing for about 10 years now. Oh well.
* Pay for print jobs (Virus Woman). She complains about her messed up, unformatted months ago, disk. Again. I try to explain. Again. No luck
* Word proc
* Books on lauds and vespers and other orders of services [I order one for him]
* Pay for print job
* Word proc
* [I hear the unmistakable sounds of Librarian J approaching...]

I couldn't keep up; I know I missed people especially towards the end when I was helping 2 people at once most of the time.
Meanwhile...I got nothing else done. I missed the news report that all wackos should be at the library this morning, or else.

3 - whenever relief gets here... [which would be 4, not 3:30 as I was expecting]

* Direct Assistance for homeless contact info.
* Together in Exile and Poor Ignorant Children by Peter Murphy [we own neither]
* Family member needs help with homework
* [phone] Librarian M wonders if we are using BTonline at the Ref. Desk [nope]
* To Love a Child [not on shelf, hasn't circed in 2+ years, can't ILL because she has rural card...what a mess, poor woman]
* Tax forms. Yes; people really are that blind, I guess
* "County X's city plan." [??] She thinks she wants the county plan documents, but also takes the city ones to peruse
* IRS Form 1098 [sorry sir, no coupon-y forms; YOU get to call them...woo hoo]
* Local phone book and can he use a study room to make a phone call [wow--a polite cell phone user]
* [There are some very cool neck/shoulder tension release websites, but none of the stretches are working for me today; neither did the 3 ibuprofen + 3 Tylenol I took this morning]
* "What's the newest Guinness Book of Records we can check out?" [2002]
* "Midsummer's Dreams Nights..." By Bill [He knew the name, just got tangled up in his words]
* Need paper in printer
* Word proc
* Word proc
* Techie V can't remember a trick I showed her for using the cataloging program
* "Who do I write about the sidewalks in town?"
* Need paper in printer
* Pay for print jobs
* [phone] Left Behind. The first book. Not the comic book which library in town of H says is all that exists. She's been on hold almost 6 minutes!! And was still nice when I finally got there!
* Word proc
[AHA! Relief, and assistance, has arrived!! YAY]
* Print payment, plus needs a floppy
* "Why did my map print weird?" [because the site is psycho]
* Print-and-floppy guy needs to know where Brit History is
* I clear kids from lower level hoping to stop potential goofing off [we've had reports from the schools that we are the best place for....erm, much 'non-library' activity]
* Need paper in printer

Get me outta here!

11 - 12 noon

* I show Rotten Tomatoes to Librarian F, Movie Buff
* Guy stands here using scratch paper to copy an entire letter out of a magazine by hand
* Changed card number (so she can get on Internet) to new one
* Register for internet use
* And she wants to know how to access the blue book for cars online
* Supreme Court case decision on non-biological parental child support requirements; she can't remember the year or the case number/name, but she has the article. At home
* Look up card number for internet use. No ID=nope
* Patron R is here
* How can I check my criminal record online? For free. hah
* What are the websites to file state and federal taxes?
* My relief person is sick! Who is up next? The drama unfolds as my stomach growls
* Tax forms (are people blind??)
* Librarian F brings me more cr#*& to catalog
* Librarian M will cover this hour so I can eat YAY


Meanwhile, barcoding new books...

11 - 12 noon

* Word proc
* Printer needs paper
* [phone] Patron needs one of the state "sales and use tax" forms; I spend 15 minutes hacking around our wonderful [hah!] state revenue department website before finally finding out that she has to call them and request it

Thank goodness for that woman, otherwise this hour would have put me right to sleep!

Time to swap donations for icky-looking library copies.

J Desk, 4 - 5 p.m.

* Someone returns headphones (at least they are sitting on top of the keyboard when I arrive)
* [phone] Family member checking on when I leave today
* Compliment on our educational computer games vs. library in city of M.
* Techie V comes up with several complicated questions. Now my brain hurts. She also wants to find The Tale of Desperaux [placed a hold for her]
* "Do we have today's paper?" asks complimentary mom [Yes, in the reading room]
* Brazen dad takes kids into story room to see the fish better. He then leaves them in there so he can take a picture from the outside. With his cell phone [What a dork]
* Dork's kids are now taking all the storytime supplies out of cupboards and boxes [I just heard the circ desk people 'remind' him that his kids need supervision]
* He now bustles up and asks me, "So what is all this? Do we need to sign up? What are these kids doing?" etc etc. Five questions in 4 seconds. "Do we have any Veggie-Tales videos?" [Obviously not a parent who has heard of books. I try to patiently answer all his questions, once I figure out what he really wants, but boy I'm cranky--I need to go home before I say any of the stuff I'm thinking!]
* ...but his kids are pretty cute...
[new patrons. thank goodness]
* Nope, there really isn't any place around here to see the Easter Bunny "in person"
* Check out at the front desk
* Dork family is back [but I'm leaving!]

Meanwhile, there is a new Demand order to work on.

I am so ready to go home.

3 - 4 p.m.

* Books on drumming
* Reset time on internet? [I'm too tired to argue: SURE]
* Where is the person I'm supposed to be working here with??
* Director reminds me that we need to work on Friends Scavenger Hunt next week; we are the only ones who will know the answers...
* Aha--there's my co-desk person (at 3:13)
* Group of 5 teenage girls, one of whom needs more books on the atomic bomb; they are all noisy, except the actual person I'm helping
* "Do you have my slushies? I left them here an hour ago." [Yes. And yes they are DQ slushies. At the library. What the %^*$?]
* Books on PCs; turns out they can't figure out how to open their email on their new computer at home. They are not young people. And they are clueless. [I suggest they sign up for our Internet class; they agree]
* I find new baby pictures from New Mom Librarian in Ofoto
* Easy Spanish books [she really needs books on learning Spanish]
* [phone] Over the Edge: Death in Grand Canyon, by Michael Ghiglieri [YES! It's on the shelf, here!]
* Word proc but also needs to use Internet; oh and more time please? [sure, why not?]
* We've lost our paging list page for the day; she's probably not here, what with Spring Break and all
* Internet signup
* The director finds reserves on unordered books from 2002 in the disaster that is the Order Drawer. [oops] Moral and ethical quandary: call patrons and admit we goofed? Ignore the reserves and quietly toss them? Hmmm--WWDD?

Meanwhile, I am schlepping through the box of Weird Cataloging Junk that has accrued over the last month.
Final count for today: one item no longer in system, two items "on the fly," one item on Reserve (for close to 18 months??) to be moved back to circ, one picture book that should be elementary non-fiction, one kids' bio of Robt. Kennedy that needs to be moved to history from 921, and two missing barcodes.

1 - 2 p.m.

* Big box of factory-reject chocolate arrives in workroom; everyone leaps on it
* One of my least favorite patrons, Crazy Airport Man, is back after a year's absence; what have I done to deserve this? He needs another printout of what he already has in his hand, dated August '02. I print it just to get him outta here. Thank God for the Internet!! [He used to come in and ask for all the mayors in the 25 or so communities surrounding our nearest major airport--imagine finding current names, addresses and phones for this, about every 10 months...]
* Word proc guy can't figure out how to put floppy in drive
* No Social Skills patron: "Hel-lo"
* Word proc signup; I notice that the other two are also in use and fill write in approx times
* Word proc guy thanks me: "Couldn't have done it without you!"
* Girl wants to know if card is expired, then tells me she's moved out of town, then asks about rural card choices, then wonders why people can't be online "every other hour"
* Same Girl with friends, all trying to use one terminal and behaving like puppies; I tell them one person per terminal [woman next to them smiles at me thankfully--she very nearly got kicked]
* Librarian T is trying to figure out why she needed to "fill in" today [there are no gaps on the schedule]
* Tax forms
* This year's issues of "Chicago" magazine; the box isn't there [yes it is; he's having a Friday moment]
* Word proc signup
* "Did you need some help?" No
* Same Girl [see above] asks about using typewriter. [yes, it's free, but you need to bring your own paper] I suggest she read a book if she's killing time. She rolls her eyes and goes to a catalog station. [because anything, even catalog searching, is better than reading, I guess]
* Librarian T goes home; not needed after all
* Where's my relief??

Meanwhile, are the books on these lists missing, lost, or what? Hmm, I try to figure it out.

11 - 12 noon

* Chit chat with Librarian J
* "Welcome back" [from Techie L]
* Amortization tables with 4% interest rates for 5 years
* Tax forms
* Librarian J is back: "Where's the director?" [Haven't seen her lately] She wanders away
* Custodian returns errant pencil
* Bathroom, and can he leave his Internet logged on while he's there?
* Internet signup
Another quiet hour.

Meanwhile, back to the telecourse tapes. Ugh.

J Desk, 9 - 10 a.m.

I'm back from vacation--time to hit the Reference Desks running.

* Family member brings me my PDA from home and picks up his reserve
* Child in my son's class wanders through. Twice. Thrice. [I think he's gone now...]
* Another child in same class arrives with mom and sis
* It's definitely Spring Break; lotsa elem school age kids wandering through. On their own, and behaving! WOW.
* 2 Internet signups (mom & son)
Quiet hour.

Meanwhile, I worked on last week's Demand order.